The Secret to Happiness (It was the TED talk's Title not Mine)

Today, let us talk about Robert Waldinger.
This guy:

Why is he important?
If you watched the Ted talk you already know he is the fourth director of an ongoing study that studies 742 individual men over the course of 75 years.
This is the longest study of its kind.
What is the nature of the study?
Happiness.

What makes people happy?

They discovered:

• relationships
• the quality of those relationships

"The good life is built with good relationships"

That is the conclusions of their research so far (IT IS STILL ONGOING!)
That overall, the subjects of their study, which, let us be frank, are pretty biased (Harvard men), report that the better their personal relationships, the better quality of life they experience.

Relationships are the single most important determining factor in a healthy and productive life.

When asking millenials what they value, 80% reported financial success, getting rich.
50% reported getting famous.

So what the scientists have discovered is that healthy relationships are the most important factor for determining happiness.
And based on their control group (disenfranchised Boston youth of the 1930s), your outward circumstances/opportunities are not the most important factor.
Having and maintaining those relationships is the most important thing.

Why do I care about this topic?
Mostly because it reinforces my position:
Community in theatre/art is the most important thing to help it grow and develop.

But, it is also really close to home.
And I mean that almost literally.
I recently moved out to a new city across the country from friends, family, and the whole community I love and depend on for sanity.
I have made big moves before with varying degrees of success.

However, one night, I was lying awake wondering about my anxiety when I realized that I have always lived with people
Friends, family, loved ones.

• family home
• college dormitories
• 10 Altin (apartment house with three artists)
• Trumbull House (apartment house with three artists)
• Hancock St (apartment across from university, student neighbors)
• 5th Ave S (apartment with partner)

One of these things is not like the others.

Suddenly, I was across the country, isolated, with only a single person or two to rely on for society.

I will not lie, I was miserable.

I could barely get out of bed (still have trouble, but at least I do)

I didn't eat.

I didn't exercise.

I produced nothing for weeks.

I pretended to be a struggling artist.

Instead I was just struggling to find or do anything.

I applied everywhere except the art community.

Auditions came and went. 

I waited for the spring.

I was unhappy.

In the worst possible sense.

I was angry and embittered towards everyone and completely inconsolable.

And then, I remembered why I moved out to Seattle.

The community.

A place for friends to fall back and find a place to recoup after the hardships inherent in our artistic life.

I was living that hardship.

I needed that place.

I needed to either make it or find it.

So I started messaging people.

I have gotten very adept at the Facebook Messenger app.

Creating groups of friends, now labelled "10 Altin" and "Trumbull House" helps me feel connected to those places.

Those spaces.

It tells me that those mythic places aren't gone, the people are now separated, but they still exist because it is our relationship to one another that created those spaces.

Digital mediums are able to replicate the feelings.

Though it does not replace them.

So I work actively to reconnecct with the people and places where my artistry flourished.

That was a very important first step.

But, the actual, physical living arrangement was also important.

So I started talking with local artists.

Seattle has some of the best art walks I have ever seen.

We went to one with our friend Mark and found out about Georgetown, a local artist area.

Went to Georgetown and met Tenaya.

Who no world of a lie lives in an artist space.

Now, I had started looking into them that week.

An artist space tends to be a community area, similar to a dormitory.

You live with other artists, in an apartment building in subsidized housing, with large community areas to display/showcase your work.

There are several in the Seattle area and one opening up in Detroit.

We are applying to the ones in Seattle and are moving to the one in Detroit.

Young Fenix House.

I am very excited and if everything goes through, we will be among artists contributing to theatre for social change in the heart of Detroit producing year round.

Because when I was a young lad and my teachers asked me what I wanted out of this life, I just wanted to produce art.

Live comfortably and make things.

That was really the beginning and end of my ambitions.

I want recognition for my artistry.

I was recognized for it in undergrad by being cast.

I was recognized for it by being invited to attend graduate school.

And now I am being recognized for it by being invited into one of the art spaces that I have always dreamed of being a part of.

I could not be more excited.

The road is hard.

It does not get easy.

Your life is a story, if it is easy you are in stasis and that means the boom is coming.

So enjoy a little mayhem, a little chaos.

And work towards your dreams.

You may not get them right away or in the way you expected.

But, if you keep an open mind and a strong community, you will be happy to weather the storm and find exciting adventures on the other side.